A pregnant woman is about to give birth.
\nThe doctor has her on the delivery table, legs up in the stirrups. Suddenly, he sees the top of a head push through. Then the baby pops its head out and says to the doctor, \u201cAre you my dad?\u201d.<\/p>\n
The doctor says, \u201cNo, I am your doctor!\u201d. With that, the baby pops right back inside.<\/p>\n
\u201cDamn!\u201d, says the doctor.<\/p>\n
A short while later he sees the head push through again. \u201cAre you my dad?\u201d, asks the baby.<\/p>\n
\u201cNo, I am your doctor.\u201d, he replies. Once again the baby vanishes back into his mother\u2019s womb.<\/p>\n
The doctor turns to a nurse and says, \u201cNurse, get that baby\u2019s father in here right away\u2013we may have a situation on our hands!\u201d.<\/p>\n
Moments later the baby\u2019s father is in the delivery room, and the baby\u2019s head once again pops out.<\/p>\n
\u201cAre you my dad?\u201d, the baby asks of the father.<\/p>\n
The father replies, \u201cYes, little baby, I am your father!\u201d<\/p>\n
The baby then reaches up and begins poking his father in the forehead with his index finger: \u201dHow do you like that?\u201d<\/p>\n
With all the new technology regarding fertility recently, a 65-year-old woman was able to give birth.
\nWhen she was discharged from the hospital and went home, her relatives came to visit.<\/p>\n
\u201cMay we see the new baby?\u201d one asked.<\/p>\n
\u201cNot yet,\u201d said the mother. \u201cI\u2019ll make coffee and we can visit for a while first.\u201d<\/p>\n
Thirty minutes had passed, and another relative asked, \u201cMay we see the new baby now?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNo, not yet,\u201d said the mother.<\/p>\n
After another few minutes had elapsed, they asked again, \u201cMay we see the baby now?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNo, not yet,\u201d replied the mother.<\/p>\n
Growing very impatient, they asked, \u201cWell, when can we see the baby?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWHEN HE CRIES!\u201d she told them.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhy do we have to wait until he CRIES?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cBECAUSE I FORGOT WHERE I PUT HIM. O.K.?\u201d<\/p>\n
Two babies were sitting in their cribs, when one baby shouted to the other:
\n\u201cAre you a little girl or a little boy?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI don\u2019t know,\u201d replied the other baby giggling.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat do you mean, you don\u2019t know?\u201d said the first baby.<\/p>\n
\u201cI mean I don\u2019t know how to tell the difference,\u201d was the reply.<\/p>\n
\u201cWell, I do,\u201d said the first baby chuckling, \u201cI\u2019ll climb into your crib and find out.\u201d<\/p>\n
He carefully got himself into the other baby\u2019s crib, then quickly disappeared in to the blankets. After a couple of minutes, he resurfaced with a big smile on his face. \u201cYou\u2019re a little girl, and I\u2019m a little boy,\u201d he said proudly.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou\u2019re ever so clever,\u201d said the baby girl, \u201cbut how can you tell?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cIt\u2019s quite easy really,\u201d replied the baby boy, \u201cyou\u2019ve got pink socks and I\u2019ve got blue ones.\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
A pregnant woman is about to give birth. The doctor has her on the delivery table, legs up in the stirrups. Suddenly, he sees the top of a head push through. Then the baby pops its head out and says to the doctor, \u201cAre you my dad?\u201d. The doctor says, \u201cNo, I am your doctor!\u201d. … <\/p>\n